Not yet done

Inside me lives big dreams.
An inner voice says am not yet done I just began.
I refuse to be told i can't
I refuse to hear a NO

Who says that i cannot go back to university and do medicine as my Third degree?
Speak now or forever remain silent:
.....................Silence
Oh yeah !

I was waiting to hear you speak
So that then i would seek to find out Why
Because i will fight every negative thought,person and at times even my inner voice
If at all its a No;

If at all its a No;


Black will have to turn to white.
NO will turn to YES!
Maybe will Be.
Yesterday will be today

How will be this way,
Closed doors will become open ,
Night will turn into day,
Challenges will become triumphs.

Because

I refuse to be done
I refuse to let go .
I refuse to let it be
because i am not yet done

Playing with my life
Turning all the bends
to see what else i could be
Searching for my destiny.

Yes I am not yet done
Because that inner voice says that their is more!
And i have got someone to live for!

To see what lies on the other side

GO GO GO
To the other side we longed

A whole nation queued on the doors of the embassies and high commissions
To get a ticket ; to:

GO GO GO;
To the other side.

Because how could heaven not be?
 ....On the other side So

GO GO GO
To the other side

With shacky voices as they answered the hoaxy and quizy questions.
With passports hurled back at their shacking feet.

And hearts and dreams killed.
The longings of the other side unfulfilled.

 Alas!

If i get on the other side
I promised to share whats on the other side

so that for those who never got on the other side
They may know know Know the other side

that its only
cold cold cold
on the other side.



As the

http://tinybuddha.com/blog/40-ways-to-let-go-and-feel-less-pain/

“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.”

I never knew the emotion that could come along with letting go....inside there was a lot of fear...fear of being alone. because of it i could not love completely...nobody noticed how i was not capable of loving them completely i saw them through this vapor and as i tried to reach them i was lost ...without  fire, i needed fire to grab...Yet to the world i stretched out a feeble hand....how could this feeble hand hold onto anything?
i had become half man half lost... a soul searching to find it self.

Where was the girl who was fashion crazy

Where was the girl who laughed out loud

Where was the girl who loved to draw sketches...have you seen my sketches?

Where was the artist...

Where was the lady who loved to do her nails ....ha ha ha on that note i remember doing my nails so fine that an expert refused to undo them cos he thought he would not do better.

Where was the girl with a signature? who had a unique style.... i could only remember her from a distance...she loved big hair and cloths cloths cloths shopping for stylish stuff

I lost her.............somewhere when i met a beast he took her with her and changed her into a monster that was sad and dull and ever running at times overeating because she cared no more about being small.
The cold hearted monster with the heart of a beast .....had made her empty and

Through my hazy eyes, Looking through the vapor i swore that i was gonna find her .


Until when i wore that cool sexy black miniskirt with the highest pair of stilettos one could find in that shop down on moi avenue ....


I knew that I was back!

I knew knew that had to be paired with an extra white blouse and some long hair additions 

Lilian Muli Kanene.........Competition .......here i come